Saigon day two

So we had the first reasonably relaxed day in ages- we slept in and had a long breakfast over ridiculously expensive cappuccinos. You don't see them here much and it was worth it- the Vietnamese drink drip coffee over condensed milk. We have developed a bit of a taste for it but I have been craving something more close to home.

Then we walked to the reunification Palace. This is so named after a long and bloody history. If was called the presidential palace until after the Geneva Convention decided that the french should piss off out of Vietnam in the mid 50's and was then renamed the Independence Palace. Here the "puppet" government of the South hung out during the war or "American aggression" as it is called here. In 1975 the tanks from the North stormed the gates and the prime minister of the South signed an unconditional surrender. Without the Americans for back up they were left with little choice. Then the Palace became the Reunification Palace, signifying the unification of the North and South as the Socialist REpublic of Vietnam. This was fairly interesting and we wandered about for a couple of hours taking in a short documentary. i would love to get hold of the doco and watch it and sort through the word choice propoganda- it showed a lot of American news footage but without the sound, and had a Vietnamese narrative (in English)- there were many times that the narrative would describe the country of vietnam as great and unbeatable when it suited the topic and then change to say that Vietnam was a small and poor nation when discussing the atrocities of american invasion. Interesting to say the least.

After this we walked to the War Remnants museum which is basically a series of photographs depicting the heinous nature of war crimes (mostly those inflicted by the Americans). It was a very moving, frustrating and infuriating experience and has got me "over thinking" life as I am prone to do even on a good day. We saw some hideous photographs of the effects of agent orange on people. They showed a photo of a baby born in 1996 who had no legs and another child born in 1992 whose forehead was swollen and disfigured from parental exposure. Further inflaming my anger was the fact that the American government paid out 200 000 000 dollars to American, Australian and Korean troups affected by the chemical but has yet paid any compensation to the civilians of Vietnam. Seeing the effects on children born in the 1990s made me think of my own family- if we were Vietnamese myself, my brothers and sisters could all be significantly deformed due to something we weren't even alive to be a part of. Disgusting.

I am further confused by things visitors had written in the guest book- many claiming to love the Vietnamese and hate all Americans (mostly European people not connected to the war) and while I consider myself to be somewhat anti-american and extremely cynical I can't help feeling that its this kind of absolutism that leads to war in the first place. It is very difficult to claim that either side was completely right or completely wrong- I don't agree with american involvement in the war (I think I don't anyway- after my discussions with Nam I am left a little confused and think maybe thats a good place to be- to question and reconsider is probably the safest way to discovering the truth)- but I don't agree with a blanket hatred of all Americans (even if they do make for annoying tourists). I also read a very heart moving comment from an Australian Vietnam vet who said that he couldn't stay in the museum for long because it was too emotional for him, he went on to say a heartfelt apology for his involvement in the war, saying that as a 20 year old he believed everything he was told and now knows that he was wrong. I felt such sadness for him- I thought about how at age 20 I had many convictions that I have since had the freedom to reassess due to experience and maturity- some of whihc I may feel embarrassed by but at the very least had limited impact on others. It must be excruciating to live with that kind of regret and feelings of guilt.

being at this museum also made me angry and frustrated in other ways. The war in Vietnam is such recent history and yet we seem to be making the same mistakes still. War in Iraq and Afghanistan - killing civilians using democracy to mask a mroe sinister and greed fueled aim and yet few people stand up and protest. We seem to make movies about and reminisce about how romantic and passionate the moratorium rallies of the 60s and 70s were yet when Tim and I attended rallies in Sydney protesting australian war involvement and affiliation with America there were shamefully few people there. Why are we so apathetic and willing to make the same mistakes again and again? As we have been travelling it has really impacted upon me how similar people are regardless of language and culture barriers and yet we don't identify with these people who are being killed and robbed of the opportunities that we take for granted because they have a different language and religion. I am rambling now, but I can't get my feelings or ideas straight- I feel like I want to know where I stand- but feel very on the fence in many ways. After today I feel confused but extremely extremely lucky to be born in Parkes in NSW in Australia.